Of course, underneath all the details of my life, I’m still ME, but even that has changed because I am ME in love, and ME in a relationship and ME totally and thoroughly and unconditionally loved for who I am by a man who is my husband. So that definition I have of myself, my own understanding of who I am, how I think and behave, how I react and engage, how I live my life – all those things have been reshaped, reconfigured, by true love. It feels miraculous that I can still be ME and yet such a different version of what I know, at the same time.

That’s really the magic of it. Love doesn't just change your life’s circumstances – where and how and with whom you live – it changes you on the inside. And if you’re wondering whether love or a relationship or marriage is “hard work” I say no, it is not work at all. And it is not difficult. It is revealing, for sure. It is complex. It means being able to deal with many new emotions and different circumstances, but it doesn’t feel like hard work. But then again, I have never found talking things over or feeling my way through complexities or even fighting and crying to be “hard” – to me these are just parts of being human and they complement our other parts – laughing and relaxing and reminiscing and telling stories and making plans. So many sides of the human experience and in the end, I think all of it is good.