Dating Sites Over 50 – My Story 

How and where I found love at 55 – and yes, it was online.

I get this question all the time: What are the best dating sites for women over 50? I’ll tell you my story and what I learned along the way.

First, a bit of history: I got divorced in my mid 30s when I was living in Chicago. For the next 20 years, I dated and looked for love, in three different cities – Chicago, L.A. and Seattle.

In Chicago, I was on Match, OKCupid, Bumble, and eHarmony. I also spent several months doing It’s Just Lunch, a matchmaking service where I met with a team of matchmakers in person, and they set me up on dates with available men who met my criteria.

In L.A. I was on Match, Hinge, Bumble, and Coffee Meets Bagel. I also used a Dating Concierge, someone who vetted online matches for me. (I had a demanding, full-time job at an advertising agency in Santa Monica, and felt that I had no time for searching, texting, and vetting potential dates. Though I really liked my Concierge, I was wrong about not having time. I always find time for things that matter to me. It was an excuse and an avoidance technique.) I wanted to try Tinder but I was intimidated because I thought it was mainly for younger people and hook ups (I was wrong about that too).

In Seattle, I was still on Match, Hinge, and Bumble. Six months after I moved to Seattle, I met David on Hinge. We were married two years later.

Here’s what my online dating history tells you. I tried a lot of dating sites to start with. I switched up what didn't work for me. I stuck with the ones I liked.

One size does not fit all

There is no “one” dating site that is best for women (or men) over 50. Or for that matter, any age. The best strategy is to be consistent with your effort and persistent in your focus. Try as many as you can and see which ones work best for you. Ask these questions:

  • Is it Easy: Is the interface easy for you to understand and use?
  • Is it Helpful: Does customer service offer technical support and help when you need it?
  • Is it Working: Are you getting matched with people who seem like potential partners?
  • Is it a Hassle: Are you overwhelmed by mis-matches (people you are not interested in)?

The dating site I liked best

My favorite dating site was Hinge, for a few reasons.

The profiles consisted of a series of photos and a few fun questions that you could answer seriously or playfully. These questions gave me the opportunity to get a real glimpse into the personalities of my potential matches. I wanted to match with men who were clever, funny, and lighthearted, but at the same time genuine, honest, and not just looking for hookups. You would be amazed at how many men can’t manage to answer three simple questions without being weird, goofy, or offensive. For me, it was a fast and easy way to weed out non-matches.

I also liked the Swipe Left/Swipe Right modality of Hinge. It felt easy, something that I could dip in and out of whenever I had spare time. At the time that I met David, I was living in a new city, establishing an online brand-coaching business. I didn’t want dating to feel like a chore, or a huge time commitment. I was not interested in reading long-form profiles. That was MY preference at the time. I urge you to think about where YOU are in your dating journey and what you would most like to read when you’re evaluating matches.

The best way to know is to try

Online dating, like anything else, is something you have to experience for yourself. I believe it’s a gateway to possibility. You will absolutely meet far more people online than you ever will in your day-to-day life, no matter how many clubs or groups you join. Matchmakers are another great resource, but they can be expensive, and depending on where you live, not necessarily even available. Online dating is everywhere, and can be used by anyone.

You will increase your chances to find love after 50 if you get comfortable – and excited – looking for it online.

As you consider which dating site or app to try, keep this one thing in mind: when you want something new in your life, it all begins with you. Make the promise to yourself to keep at it until you find the love you deserve. Perseverance above all else is the key ingredient in Finding Love.

For an overview of eight great dating sites, get our Dating App Download for FREE.

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